When a client shares “I just don’t see how this could ever be different”, I get excited because I know personally that we are never truly stuck in hard place in our lives. There is always a way to shift and alter our present position.
Early on in my career I had a strong *belief* that people could change, but I was also searching for personal evidence that this was a Truth. Internal Family Systems and Mindfulness work allowed me the actual, physical and emotional experience of finally feeling “okay” in my own skin. It was an experiential understanding. Not one that came from my mind wanting things to change, but from an internal knowledge that I could unhook from the pain and hurt that I once experienced as Mt Everest.
That first glimpse, and subsequent felt-sense experiences of emotional freedom have given me the faith that I hold when I hear those words from clients.
After I work with someone, and we begin to see their personal patterns, and begin to understand why they do the things they do to get through life, I often hear, “I don’t think I have ever thought about it, or seen my life, in this way.” And I want to release the environmentally friendly balloons from the ceiling and celebrate. Helping people broaden their perspective and learn to work *with* their thoughts, emotions and behaviors is why I do this work.
When the light bulb goes off for someone, and they are still for a moment and their mind is quiet and they are simply present with themselves, that is why I love this work. Because from there, the options for self-care are limitless. When your mindset expands, and you can access your creativity – there really is no reason you cannot have the life you want.